Over the past few months it came to one big total I had no idea :( I had become so addicted to that website. Its just so easy to search and bid and then you get billed for what you've bought and paying through paypal takes a minute to just press a button and bought. Its hard to explain but it started when I saw Spirited Away for the first time thats what got me started into Ghibli as I liked what I watched and wanted to watch more. There hasn't been a lot in my life hobby wise, well theres been my activism. Whales and Dolphins I've loved since being in Primary School but thats about it. Ghibli was a start into me loving Japan and what a wonderful country it seems to me and one day want to visit.
After watching the movies I saw the merchandise you can buy related to the movies and that was it, it went from there. It started out to be harmless enough by the DVD a book but then its got wider. Like little collectables, the museum tickets I have to collect and film cels. I discovered a Japanese buying service and once I could see that I could bid on anything it was that easy. Most of my things are from that website. Some I love and treasure some others were just hiding away under my bed.
I had no clue how much this hobby has cost and nearly cost me my family and everything as my dad was so angry at me. Boredom was partly to blame as I go on regularly just search for something and place a bid. I don't know why there business card was assigned to my account maybe mum wanted me to pay for something and I never deleted it. I would try my card to pay but as usual 'card declined' so I thought I better not get into trouble and it won't be that much I'll use the other.I honestly thought it was about a couple of 100 the most not what it was even I was shocked at that.
I guess being lonely and not going out much Ghibli was the only thing I had. It made me happy and all I needed. Now to pay my dad back I have to sell them. They won't reach what I paid for as most probably went to fees, fees for using the site, buying the item and postage.
I thought of getting a loan but with my bad credit history there was only few I could use but wasn't that simple. I need someone to back me up who was a homeowner and there wasn't anyone I could ask and the fees were a hundred more. So probably take me an extra year to pay it all back.
What a spot of bother I'm in. I started to go through my collection to see what I could sell and to see it all out is quite upsetting knowing I have to sell it quite heartbreaking. The few that I like I've hidden, I just can't part with them. Some are what I have scattered around my room like my two robots and my Cells.
It seems a long way of to pay of this debt :( I still prefer a loan to pay him back asap instead of waiting for money to come through on ebay which could do a long time.
Made about £300 so far still a long long way off I don't know how to get the rest of the money.
With all this going on we got into a big argument and I left. I tweeted that I was looking at flats at the time I wanted to move out it was just an idea a upsetting idea. Maybe for the future though I'd love to have my own place. I've found a house in Thornton I have my eye on which would be good for my 1st house.
Dad went to Football and someone who follows me and I follow them on Twitter asked him about the flat thing. He wasn't best pleased that I wanted to leave. Thinking no way could I love on my own he thought that he would put me in the garage to have a taste of it. I was in my room and he came upstairs and went you wouldn't be able to afford lighting and turned the lights of nor the heating so turned the radiator off and said go in the garage basically and have a feel in there a experience of living on ones own and I'd have to buy my own food what ever I could afford once I pay for rent and the bills. This was too much for me to take and I thought he was going a tad too far I grabbed what I could and walked out. It was raining not the perfect night to walk out on. He was happy to see me go but mum wasn't. I dragged myself out of the house and didn't really have anywhere to go its not like I have millions of friends I could rely on who would take me in well not really I don't think so. I do feel out of touch with people. If I didn't text them I wouldn't know if there alive or well. Quite rare anyone texts me out of the blue and asks how I am or invites me to do anything.
Eventually mum caught up with me and told me to go to Nans I was there for a few days. Its always good of Nan to take me in its not the 1st time. I stayed for a few days and mum told me dad had calmed down so I went round to make a list of things to sell I was here for a few hours and heard mum and dad arguing it wasn't a good argument to listen to, so not wanting to, to listen to more I just left.
I rang the doorbell to Nans a few times and no answer so I had to get a key and went to bed.
The other next day I got up around 12 and saw Nans door was closed so I went to see if she was up she wasn't. Thinking she was having a lie in I made a brew and some toast. Mum rang me to say come round and I could list some stuff to sell.
I was at the table and heard Nan coming down the stairs she was a bit un steady on her feet and was spilling her drink. She sat down and didn't seem herself she told me she didn't feel right and her speech was of and the side of her face was a bit lopsided. I said I'd be right back and went upstairs and rang mum I said Nan didn't seem right for her to come round asap. I went back down and waited for Mum.
It turned out Nan went to bed early as she didn't feel well and didn't feel right in herself. Mum thought maybe she had a stroke and best for her to go to Hospital. I said the idea was probably best. She went back home to gather some things and dad came round to see her. Decided to call an Ambulance as to see what the paramedics would suggest. Managed to help her get dressed as she couldn't really help herself get dressed and waited for the ambulance. Once they came just left them to talk to Nan. I asked if I could go with dad to the Hospital and so he did but the whole way it was silence I wanted to talk but just couldn't think of the right words so thought it was best not to speak at all.
We waited with Nan in the hospital for a room to be seen it was a few hours. Waiting amongst others who wanted to be seen there were a few other old people and a couple of rooms with other people in them. There seemed to be nurses around just talking and typing on the computer. Finally got her into a room and Christian came to visit as Jamie came to see Christian and saw the ambulance rang Christian saying theres an ambulance outside ya Nans house. We left before anyone came to check Nan I came home to list items and Christian went back to the house. It turned out she had a minor stroke a little stroke leading to a big one. A blood clot in the brain as she was taken of her tablets a while ago to thin her blood and never put back on them. When I went to see her her speech was still off and she seemed weak and tired.
All we need. Nan in hospital again. She was in hospital for 6 weeks last time. Been to see her lately now she is on the Stroke ward as a bed came available. The stroke had took affect on her left side as if she doesn't move her hand it'll claw up and she won't be able to use it normally and when she walkes her left leg she said feels wobbly and needs the help of a frame.
Mum has gone every night to visit and now were waiting for her to come home but has to be a lot of changes. Our holiday in March has been cancelled and moved to November were pretty bummed and I was looking forward to swimming with belugas on my Birthday but mum thought it was the best thing to do.
Changes are going to be made to her home like a stairlift and a shower with a seat. She needs some more physio then may be able to come home.
Its a sign of her to slow down as she does too much and she's 80 this year. She has finally decided to stop going to the hospice as she has volunteered for years and done her bit.
Now its own turn to look after her.
